morning! i had a weird dream yet again...

so picture this: a bougie version of the tipton hotel from suite life of zack & cody. we (me + the hotel people) went on a little field trip -- a cute little outing, if you will. the activity? a sliding competition. mario kart style. except the venue was somehow DEEPLY dingy and creepy, which raises questions about the event planning committee...

oh and markiplier was there. jacksepticeye too, except he was sitting all the way in the front looking like he just crawled out of a 2016 while mark looked completely current.

anyway. i slid down. everything first person so i'm assuming it's me. here's the thing about this contraption though - towards the end, there's a section specifically designed to make your clothes stick to it. like a velcro trap of humiliation. and if you don't have enough velocity, you simply... stop. mid-slide. and then you do the walk of shame back to the line. because yes, we had to WAIT IN LINE TO LEAVE until everyone finished. this event had bureaucracy.

a few people had minor incidents. myself included. HOWEVER. i came prepared. not with a backup. not a double layer. a TRIPLE layered suit. i want it on record that dream-me was built for adversity.

NOW. prior to all this, we had to store our belongings in a compartment before sliding. we get back to the hotel and i reach for my stuff and... gone. i have to go back for it, which takes hours!!!!

so naturally, i make a pit stop at home first. except my home had strangers living in it and the entire place was flipped upside down. did i question this? absolutely not. i simply walked in and started stuffing a giant black bag full of letters. why letters? it's dream logic as usual...... we don't ask.

i then rushed to the train station -- which was somehow fancier than usual -- looking like i had just barely survived robbing a post office. burglar fit. giant mysterious letter bag. not a great look for public transit but we move.

i arrived and miraculously it was still night. the place looked closed, lights off. but then i saw the escalators.

idk why but they became an obstacle course to me personally. so naturally i decided to climb up the CENTER of the escalator. you know, the smooth slide part in the middle. almost made it. ALMOST. then i dropped a letter. 

so now i'm spread-eagle on an escalator, one hand death-gripping the edge so i don't slide back down, the other arm desperately fishing for this letter, giant black bag still strapped to me, looking absolutely unhinged.

and then. in the corner of my eye. a small man. 

baby yoda? no. joe pesci. 

he looks at me. he SHOUTS: "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO BE HERE!!"

i, a grown adult wearing a heist bag and lying on an escalator at a closed building in the middle of the night, decided the correct response was to bolt. usain bolt style >:3 found the cubicles. walked in. 

and then i woke up.

ngl i started second-guessing posting this halfway through writing it. but then i remembered that i climbed an escalator like a goblin while joe pesci yelled at me, and honestly u guys deserve to know.

ok bu-byeeeeeee!!!

Labels: 2026年2月, dreams, entries